The Truth about Family Travel

​A few unexpurgated selections from my journal during a family trip to Paris:

”I swore I would never take a vacation with these people again. And here I am.”

”I thought G and V were going to tear each other’s faces off in the car on the way to the airport.”

“Yesterday we were all quite out of sorts with traveling and jet-lag.”

”I have given birth and helped to raise spoiled people and I apologize to the world.”

“Never again.”

”Disneyland. Torture. Hell. No one really likes the rides. Pirates was closed and we never went back to see if it had reopened. It was cold. Food was overpriced. And Mickey Mouse is an asshole. At least there’s wine.”

”The museum has a kind of online app that is supposed to help navigate, but if you get into different floors the app picks up different floors and indicates you’re on a different floor. ???”

”Louvre. Lots of whining and grumbling.”

”Invalides. We went with just the younger two kids because S was still feeling sick and S was consumed with ennui.”

”S goes to great lengths to make sure we all know how unpleasant he finds us.”

”As I said, never again.”

”I think were going to impose an ‘under 18’ rule for family vacations. Over 18 they need to start paying for themselves.”

”Sunday. Rainy morning. Even though it has been in the 50s it feels cold because of the dampness.”

”In the meantime, laundry, shopping, dishes, cooking. Trying to remember if anyone said thank you. I don’t think so.”

”S didn’t leave the house.”

”It snapped something inside me and I said I was tired of everyone blaming me for everything. I smashed the rest of the dinner away and went for a walk along the canal. I’ll miss this place. I’m not sure I’d miss my family if they weren’t here. I feel like I’m constantly criticized for over planning, under planning, spending too much, spending too little, doing the wrong things, doing too much. Pretty much everything. Tomorrow I’m going to Sainte Chapelle when it opens and hope there isn’t a line."